For the last 2 weeks, I identified 3 types of negative thinking that interfere with people’s healing. Make sure you read the last post of this month because I’ll be sharing some ideas of how you can get yourself out of these negative thinking traps. I will warn you, it’s not always easy to catch your own negative thinking and then do something about it. Usually, when we’re in a dark place and we realize we need to do something to change it, we’re unmotivated. Having a better idea of how your negative thinking interferes with your peace of mind can lead you to intervene quicker and in a way that is much kinder and more helpful to yourself and others.
Overgeneralization
I see this type of negative thinking most often in people with some kind of trauma and other anxiety disorders. Oftentimes, people develop this type of thinking when something went wrong for them in the past. For example, if you got hurt in past relationships, people may develop the world view that “all men are bad.” Or if a student does bad on a math test they may develop the idea, “I’ll never be good at math.” This cognitive distortion is harmful because this can prevent people from seeing the reality of the situation and what needs to change in order for future, similar situations to be better. I have known a number of people who develop the idea that “all men are bad” and they usually end up bitter about life.
Catastrophizing
People who have this type of negative thinking walk around with the feeling that, “the other shoe is about to drop,” or the next big disaster is just around the corner. I see this most often with people who, in fairness, have had some pretty major things happen to them but they carry around the belief that whatever thing comes next, they won’t be able to handle it. These people may also exaggerate their own accomplishments and minimize someone else’s. They may carry the belief that, “bad things always happen to me,” while not seeing the hard things that other people are going through. This can be especially difficult in relationships when this type of negative thinking interferes with your ability to have appropriate empathy and reciprocity in a relationship.
Personalization
People who have this type of cognitive distortion usually believe that anything that happens, or anything that another person says or does is directly related to them in a negative way. Oftentimes, when something does happen that affects you in a negative way, there are usually a number of factors that have contributed to that event. For example, if someone was abused as a child, they may believe that they could have controlled their mother or father’s rage by being better behaved. In reality, much of what happened to them was likely out of their control.
We’re all prone to negative thinking at different points in our lives but when it starts happening almost all of the time, that should be a signal that something needs to change. When you label things appropriately, you can find better ways to cope and manage your thinking.
If you struggle with any of these cognitive distortions, join us for the 21-Day Journaling Challenge. Grab your free copy here and start today.
I hope this explanation of cognitive distortions will help you understand your negative thoughts and rewire your brain. If you need more help understanding the HSP trait, please feel free to contact me at 317.496.0456 or email lisa@peacefamilycounseling.com. I’d be happy to hear what is happening and help you find the right fit for counseling. If you are looking for help with depression, anxiety, trauma or behavioral concerns, you can read more about how I can help at my website peacefamilycounseling.com